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Michael Salzwedel

Copywriter & Mindreader

Mike was born in outer space and spent his early childhood on the moon where he learnt the ways of the universe. He soon grew bored of crater hopping and wary of Americans making giant leaps across his back yard, so he relocated to Earth - East London, to be precise. There he completed his schooling, bred silkworms and was a bunny in an Easter play - fortunately not in that order.

Mike delayed the onset of forging a life in the real world for four years while he obtained his journalism and media studies degree (specialising in New Media) from Rhodes University in Grahamstown, enduring weeks of rising at the crack of noon and weekends of boosting the coffers of Sir Charles Glass. When he wasn't rally driving along the gravel back roads of Grahamstown's once-peaceful outer suburbia, Mike busied himself with occupying various key positions on Activate - the student newspaper, as well as writing for a range of other local publications.

Upon completion of his degree, Mike thought about going to South Korea to teach English, but that remained a thought. Reluctant to invest in khoki pens and cardboard to make 'no job, no money, no food' signs, he prowled around the job market for a month or two before Quirk felt sorry for him and gave him a job. Bless.

Stealing a few minutes every day to pick out a melody on his guitar is what keeps this future Coldplay frontman sane, inspired and at peace with the world. Photography is another of Mike's interests, with some of his shots making it into various publications over the years.

Although, at the time of writing, Mike has never been to jail, he has managed to have a warrant for his arrest issued, as paying no-seatbelt fines can prove tricky when you're a student on a shoe-string budget. Cleverly, Mike realised that going to jail would indeed be somewhat trickier, so he promptly resorted to a diet of potatoes and no-name peanut butter and gave the bastards their money.

"Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind."

Jack Handy

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